God bless Mommy and matchbox cars...

My boys are 7, 5, and 2. I always pictured myself having sons and daughters. I often feel like I'm not cut out for this job of raising boys, but recently I started to embrace my BOY MOM status. And it's changing my life.

I can't tell you the number of times people see me with my boys and say, 

"Wow! You have your hands full!" 

or 

"Now it's time for a girl!"

I'm sure they mean well, but the implication is either  
      a) The responsibility of raising all boys is a burden.
      b) My life is somehow incomplete because I don't have a daughter. 

Truth be told, I've mourned the fact that I don't have a daughter. We've contemplated adoption- actually, I was counting on it!- but I'm letting go of my dream of having a daughter because it's negatively affecting my reality with my boys. 

My life is not incomplete. It is FULL. Full of love. Full of noise. Full of silliness. Full of action. Full of dirty hands, faces, and floors. Full of giggles and snuggles. Full of challenges. Full of victories. Being a mother of 3 young boys is difficult. But I am sure that moms of girls have equally difficult, albeit different, challenges. Shame on me for believing the lie that my life is somehow "less than" because God didn't give me a daughter. Or that it's so difficult I should be living in a perpetual pity-party. Letting go of the labels people regularly stick on me has allowed me to walk in joy. I'm enjoying my boys for who they are, instead of stressing out about what they do. 

My prayer life is also changing for the better. I used to cry out to God for help to deal with my boys, praying that things will get easier. Now, I'm praying for my boys. Praying scripture over each of them. Embracing their differences. Asking God for wisdom on how to love and lead them in ways that they each need. Praying for the people God has put in their lives.

My two oldest each have a best buddy that they just adore. It's sweet to see how they interact with each other and to watch these friendships grow. (A wonderful benefit of teaching at their school!) This week I received a picture from another teacher of my 7-year-old exploring outside with his best friend, hand in hand. 💕 It made me think of David & Jonathan. Beliefnet.com says this, 

"1 Samuel 18 describes their friendship: 'As soon as he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.' This is the essence of friendship, to love another as you love yourself. Not only this, but Jonathan sacrificed for David, stripping himself of the items which represented his power and position, and giving them to him. Jonathan was also unwaveringly loyal to David, warning him of King Saul’s treachery and intent to kill him. The two friends shared a close emotional bond as well, and were unafraid of sharing their feelings, weeping when it became clear that David had to leave.

These three elements—displayed love, loyalty, and emotional openness, are three essential traits that psychologists deem necessary for friendships to thrive." 

(Read more here.)

I pray my boys will be that kind of a friend! And I pray that for their friends, too. I pray they will be like David & Jonathan. I pray that they will lead each other closer to Jesus.

Mother's Day is this weekend. As a mom of 3 young boys, I'm not burdened, but I am exhausted. I don't want flowers or gifts. I don't need a day full of activities (with or without my boys) to celebrate. I really don't want to go anywhere, except church and maybe the park down the street. What I want is to spend the day with my family and have someone else clean up the inevitable mess. (Husbands, take note.) I don't want to make dinner. We can have take out, leftovers, even a bowl of cereal- as long as someone else pours it and washes the dishes. I'd love to go a whole day without changing a diaper. (Maybe that's pushing it...) I want hugs, snuggles, laughs, and tickle fights. 

As my boys get older and more independent, I'm sure I will appreciate the flowers and cards. (Anything my boys give me because they chose to give it, always makes me happy.) Then they'll have children of their own and wives to think of and care for. I pray they will be the kind of husbands who celebrate their wives by giving her a break once in awhile and the kind of men who call to wish their mom a Happy Mother's Day! 

For now, I will relish in these days. I am a BOY MOM, and it's a privilege that I won't take for granted anymore. 

♫ The rocket racer's all tuckered out

Superman's in pajamas on the couch

Goodnight moon, we'll find the mouse

And I love you ♫

♫ ♥ Ashley